Total Pageviews

Friday, August 8, 2014

If I Could Turn Back Time

He laid on top of my chest, all warm and soft and smelling like Johnsons baby shampoo.
I found myself kissing him on that spot all parents know and love; right there, yes, there, right where his neck joins his shoulder.
"Why do you like to kiss me there, momma?"
I told him that was the "momma spot", the spot where all mommas kissed their babies, starting when they were all little and squishable and smelled like growing things and powder and love.
"Where's the daddy spot?"
Daddies get behind the ears. That's the daddy spot.
"What about little kids and little girls? Where do they get to kiss mommas and daddys?"
We're still working on his strangely ingrained idea that boys are little kids and girls are some otherworldly creatures who simply fall under the heading of "little girls" but never 'kids"
They get...hmmm... they get chins and cheekbones.
As I get a thousand cinnamon roll scented kisses on my face
Nope. Right here on the bony part of the cheek and right on the denty part of my chin. Has to be there. I think it's the law
"Oh. Ok. I don't wanna break the law.Then you'd have to get me out of jail and I might get in time out"
Dozens more kisses, these all in the 'right" spots.
I need to get up and get my tea. And I need to pee.
"No, momma, I want to just lay here and cuddle forever."
Arms and legs lock around my torso in a death grip

But what about when we need to go pee?
"Then you'll get up and I'll get up"
But what about when we're hungry?
"Then you'll get up and I'll get up."
What about when we feel like mushrooms growing in the dark and we need sunshine?
"Then you'll get up and I'll get up."
You do notice that that's a lot of getting up and not a lot of forever cuddling, don't you?
"I know momma, but let's do forever right now, ok?"

Yes, my darling baby boy. Let's do forever right now. Don't grow up. Stay this cuddly boy who still curls up into me with legs drawn up and hanging on so tightly that I have to think about drawing a breath. Stay this little boy who thinks I know everything and who thinks his daddy and brothers are the strongest, most amazing people on Earth. Stay this child who still smells of powder, growing things and love.

But I know you won't.

So for now, we'll just cuddle forever right now.

1 comment:

  1. Oh, Janet. You touch my heart. The one which has been held and has held in just that death grip of twisting legs. But now they are grown and we connect through iMessage and email and Skype. With together hugs so far apart but so tightly held, whenever possible, that we might never let go. I won't tell you to enjoy these years because they soon will pass, because I know you already know.